3 Things To Do This Christmas Instead Of Focusing On Being Single


It’s the most wonderful time of the year. 

Well, for the most part it is. Except when your great-aunt Brenda asks you why you’re still single for the fourth year in a row. That seems more like the opposite of wonderful. 

Let’s be real. Being single during the holidays can be hard. You don’t have two incomes to put toward buying gifts. And you end up to sleep on the couch with the dog because the couples get to sleep in the guest rooms. 

But just because being single at the holidays can be tough doesn’t mean the holidays themselves have to be. There are so many other things we can focus on over the next few weeks—things that bring joy and laughter and gratitude. It’s amazing how your outlook on this season can change when you shift your perspective. So, with that in mind, here are three things you can do during the holidays other than focus on your relationship status. 


1. Start Your Own Traditions 

If you’re like me, holidays with your family used to revolve around your parents’ or grandparents’ traditions. You did the same thing every year, going to the same houses on the same days to eat the same food. Now don’t get me wrong—that may have been a lot of fun. You might still take part in many of your family traditions, but that doesn’t mean you can’t take time this season to create a tradition or two for yourself. Be proactive. Be creative. Don’t do what you’ve always done. Host a Christmas party with some of your close friends and watch every Christmas episode of The Office, eating an entire sleeve of Tollhouse cookie dough (my personal favorite tradition). Plan a trip to the beach for New Year’s Eve. Or carve out a day for some self-care. 


2. Flip the Script 

One of the trickiest parts of navigating the holidays as a single adult can be answering all of your relatives’ questions (like great-aunt Brenda). I get it. Sometimes you’re just not in the mood to answer a bunch of questions, especially if you don’t want to talk about your love life. But I’ve learned there’s no better way to stop them from asking than to start asking. People generally love to talk about themselves, so why not give them the chance to do just that? Ask them how their work is going or what hobbies they’ve gotten into recently. Ask them for Netflix suggestions or podcast recommendations. Whatever you ask, your intentionality will go a long way. You never know what your curiosity could mean to someone. 


3. Be Generous

I know it’s cliché…but it really works. When you focus on giving, you take the focus off of yourself. Whether you’re giving gifts or just giving your time, the opportunities to be generous are endless. Leave a gift card for your mail carrier. Spend some quality time with a friend whose family doesn’t live locally. Pay for the car behind you in the Starbucks drive-thru. Whatever you decide to do, your generosity will have an impact. I promise it will be worthwhile.

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